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writing down my feelings

Dear Sherod,
     These past few weeks have been very hard for me. Your baby sister turned 16, we are finally done moving into the new house and things are starting to settle down for me after almost 3 years of running. I am facing your passing after all this time. I have found I can not run anymore....I have no where else to run but through this emotion I call Hell.
   Sometime during the last few weeks of Sept. I got several notices about some of the kids that had past on that we have connected with over the Internet/face book ect. It seemed like every other day I was hearing the news of one more child that earned there wings. My heart was breaking more and more and reminding me of the last day we had with you. I just kept crying and praying for all those families and thinking Please God Be with them in there time of need.
  Loosing you at the age of 16 was hard. Then your baby sister turned 16......my heart just sank. I think I was afraid of her to turn 16....thinking how much longer would I have her. Although she is perfectly healthy that number just scares me.
  Then with your older brother being gone and off into the Military. Although very proud of your brother I am afraid of loosing him as well. I keep praying he will not have to go off to War.
  So now that I have just spilled my heart out about all that is bothering me I feel a little bit better. I have to say this writing your emotions downs does work.
 
    On another note I know you would be so proud to hear that more families are hearing about us and contacting us for help. You have truelly blessed me with a gift to keep on giving and helping others. It 's funny how things work out even in the worst of situations.
 
   I love you Sherod and miss you like crazy everyday.
 
   Love,
  Mom

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