Company Message - Company Message
RSS

Recent Posts

Dear Sherod
It's been a long road
THE HOW AND THE WHY?!
5 YEARS AGO
Remembering you at Christmas

Categories

A letter to Andrew Becker
A letter to Heaven
Another Kind of Normal
BABY STEPS
Challenging times
Facts
Getting the Word out !
How it all began
Racing Schedule
powered by

My Blog

BABY STEPS

Just a mom missing her son

I went for a walk around the lake this last Sunday and it was snowing. It was the most spiritual walk I have been on in a while. The snow reminded me of your last night with us...it was snowing like crazy Dec. 29, 2009.  Every time it snows I think its you telling me hello and as the flakes fall from the sky and land on my face I imagine its you giving me angel kisses from heaven.
 I miss you like crazy Sherod and lately my days feel like they are dragging on forever. The past few days it has been getting harder and harder for me to get out of bed.

Missing you

No one said missing you was going to be easy, but my day to day living activities becoming harder for me to deal with now than they did when you were here.
   Everything reminds me of you and there are still days I want to crawl in your bed and snuggle with you, but your bed is not there and neither are you. I can't even explain the pain I feel at that time. It goes away for a short period but it comes back from time to time.
  Oh buddy Mommy misses you so much it hurts and I wish I could hold you right now.

Thanksgiving...a new begning

  This year will mark the 2nd year without you here for Thanksgiving. It's still just as hard not being able to see your smiling face or seeing you out of the corner of my eye sneeking into the olives to put them on all your fingers.
  I remember are last Thanksgiving together. Everyone was with us up at Nana's house and you asked if you could give the Thanksgiving prayer. You did such a wonderful job. I remember you tried so hard to stay up and visit with everyone. I knew you were hurting and were so very tired and just wanted to rest, but you kept pushing on.

Learning to Deal

I thought about you again last night...I think about you every night, but last night was different. I could see you in your bed as if you were right in front of me again on your last day here. Moments before you took your last breath.
  We all came in in small groups of two to say our good byes to you and you waited so patiently for your Father and your Gramma Judy and Grampa Sherod to get there to tell them good bye. When they came in the room Chris and I got up and let them come in...I shut the door behind me and moments later your Gramma Judy came back out to get me to tell me you were gone.
Website Builder provided by  Vistaprint